Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Facing My Fears

They say that on the road to recovery, the first step is to admit you have a problem.


I love food. I love junk food. LOVE it. I'm pretty sure I have problems with portion control. I will eat mindlessly - eg. reading a book while eating, watching tv or a movie while eating, eating because I am bored, eating because I am angry or upset; you get the idea.

I happened to stumble across a website, something like Food Addicts Annoymous, and I started to read it, and I realized that I was fitting into a lot of the symptoms. I will list the ones I found most relevant to ME:

-Do you think you cannot control your intake of food, especially junk food or high sugar foods? (Yes)
- Have you tried different diets or weight loss programs, but none has worked permanently? (Yes)
-Do you find yourself feeling depressed, hopeless, sad or ashamed about your eating or your weight? (Absolutely YES)
-Do you find yourself eating when you are upset or reward yourself with food when you do something good? (Yes about upset, on occasion as a reward)
-Do you eat in private so no one will see you? (ALL the time. I HIDE. I feel shame in what I am eating)
-Do you avoid social interactions because you feel you do not look good enough or do not have the proper fitting clothes to wear? (I don't avoid situations, but I do feel the other effects)

 I could go on and on about this. Actually writing this down and facing it is kind of making me feel a little sad but at the same time, its making me feel like I want to go out and get my favorite treat of Sweet & Spicy Chili Doritos and a tub of sour cream. Then I will proceed to hide in my room and stuff my face! :( I will not! I am actually whipping up my first Vegan meal tonight and I am excited.

Also, I kind of finished off the carrot cake bars.....whoops. That shouldn't have happened, but I was bored. I need to find a way to curb that, but I'm not sure how. How do I stop eating when I'm bored?! UGH!

Anyways, so there you have it. I'm a little bit of a food addict. Now that I have admited I have a problem, and I have made it public, what is next?

1 comment:

  1. If you're bored, you can always play Words With Friends...